Confused in Love Five (Part 5)

Love That's Lost

"Look man, I respect that you want to give him some space and think things through but are you really sure about this?"

Miko was trying to persuade Gab to not leave the country. Concern din sya sa nangyayari sa kakambal nya.

Gab: It's far too late now. I can't just back out.

Miko: Man I've known you for 5 years now and believe it or not, ramdam ko kung anong nararamdaman mo.

The two of them are playing pool at a bar near Miko's hometown. This was 1 year ago, before Gab was about to leave for the tour.

Gab: I know. After all, we're biological brothers.

Miko: Yeah right. Pero sa tingin ko, hindi makakabuti yang desisyon mo.

Gab just sighed defeated and waved his hands to dismiss the topic.

Gab: Enough about me bro. Before I go though, are you sure na ayaw mong malaman nila daddy at mommy ang tungkol sa'yo?

Miko: Bro, we've talked about this so many times over. I have my own family right in this town. I know it wasn't our parents fault but I think it's for the best para sating lahat na things remained just as they are. how many times do I have to tell you that?

Gab: Sorry. I just don't know if I'd be coming home as soon as the tour is finished. Baka magustuhan ko ang buhay abroad. Away from Akhi, away from our parents and all that shit. So before I leave, I want to make sure na sigurado ka na sa ganito, sa buhay mo ngayon.

Miko: No offense bro, but I am comfortable with the way me, my mom and my sister is living right now. It might not be a life of wealth but we are happy and I don't want control freak kind of parents to dictate what I wanna do with my life and what I wanna be.

Gab approaches him and puts one hand on his shoulder.

Gab: Miks, I envy you. If I have to choose, I would choose a life just like yours.

Miko: Well It's not always good but it's comforting. It's a struggle for sure. Lalo na't ako ang panganay, kailangan kong mag work para sa college ni Cindy. But I am fine with it. Makita ko lang syang makapagtapos it will all be worth it.

Gab: You really put your life on hold for her huh? You love her that much?

Suddenly Miko's cheeks turned red from that remark.

Miko: Yes Gab. I love her that much.

Everytime na nagkakasama't nagkikita silang dalawa, Miko never fails to mention his sister Cindy. It is kind of obvious that Miko loves her little sister a little more than he should. Since they are not blood related at all and he kind of knew about this for quite some time now. But Miko knows he can't be with her in that way because she's been his sister her whole life and she's 11 years younger than him which at the time Miko and Gab was already 29 years old. Maya maya pa, nagkaroon ng Idea si Miko.

Miko: You said you can't back out bro? What if I just took your place?

Gab: *startled* Are you serious right now? That's crazy bro! It's way too risky.

Miko: It's not hard to pretend as you. I mean we're Identical even our voices sound alike. Siguro konting adjustments lang to your style and I'll be just fine. I have experience in modeling din naman so this is not gonna be hard.

Gab: I appreciate your concern and you wanting to help but no. I've made up my mind.

Miko: *shrugs* Well suit yourself. Don't think that I'd be doing this just for you. I kinda also need the money I'm gonna get from this for Cindy. So it's a favor for both of us.

Gab: Bro alam mo naman kung may kailangan ka financially handa akong tulungan ka diba?

Miko: Gab sabi ko naman sa'yo hindi ako tatanggap ng perang hindi ko pinaghirapan.

Gab: But you deserve every bit of help me and our parents could give you.

Miko: *sigh* Gab, I am old enough to take care of myself and my needs.

Gab thinks to himself that this proud trait is something that Miko inherited from their dad.

Miko: Anyway, if you changed your mind just give me a call.

...

Present

Cindy: So everything I heard is true. Kuya Miko isn't my real brother?

She spoke while sobbing and her eyes are full of tears and they keep pouring like a waterfall. Cindy finally realizes why she had felt different about her brother. That she's been in love with the brother she knew all along. That made all these things a lot more painful as she remembers all his sacrifices for her and all the memories they shared. She clutch on her chest as she shut her eyes tightly while crying and processing everything.

Gab: Yes Cindy. It's true. I'm sorry.

Cindy: Then what happened?? Kung tumanggi ka sa alok nya bakit sya ang namatay? Why was he even on that plane?

...

One year ago the night after Gab said goodbye to his parents on the phone and wrote a letter to me.

He was on the car to pick Sarah up para sabay na silang pumunta sa airport when his phone buzzed. Sarah was calling him.

Gab: Hey.

Sarah: Gab, I'm sorry but I am not coming with you.

Gab: Why not?

Sarah: I know I said it is okay, I knew what was coming. That you weren't serious about getting into a relationship with me and that it's okay that you suddenly broke up with me. Pero honestly, I feel hurt.

Gab: Sarah, I'm sorry.

Sarah: No Gab. Don't be sorry. It's my fault that I fell in love with you sa maikling panahon. But I know this shall pass. I just need to be away from you for a while. I need to do what's best for me and I think you should do the same. Take care Gab.

Then she hung up.

Gab burried his face to his palm realizing how his actions affected someone who's innocent in all of this. Sarah's words replayed in the back of his mind. "I need to do what's best for me and I think you should do the same." His car arrived at the airport then the driver helped him with his luggage and then left. Maya maya pa nakita nya si Miko.

Gab: Bro? What are you doing here?

He approached him.

Miko: I am sending you off bro! You did say you might not come back for a while and I know I'm gonna miss hanging out with you. *bro hug*

"I need to do what's best for me and I think you should do the same." Sarah's words replayed in Gab's mind again.

Gab: Miks...

Miko: Bakit bro?

Gab: Remember your offer?

Miko also hoped that Gab was going to change his mind kaya naman sya nagpunta sa airport just in case.

Miko: Yes bro.

Gab: *sigh*

Miko: You changed your mind?

Gab: Are you still up for it?

Miko: Of course bro! That's kinda like half of the reason why I am here right now.

Gab thinks for a moment giving it much consideration. Then finally he came up with a decision.

Gab: I am gonna owe you so much for this Miks.

Miko clasps Gab's hand tightly and shakes it as he said

Miko: Just take care of yourself okay? Don't make the same mistakes anymore. This is your chance na ayusin ang buhay mo at relationship mo.

Gab: Thank you, Miks.

Miko: Oh and bro, paki tingnan tingnan nalang lagay nila Cindy at mama sa bahay ha?

Gab: Sure bro!

Miko smiled at Gab and it felt strange. His smile looked as if he was more than prepared to leave. Gab strangely felt a stinging pain and sadness in his heart. He couldn't explain why.

Miko gave Gab one last tight hug.

Miko: Goodbye Gab. I'll miss you bro.

Gab gave his passport and other necessary documents to him then he went inside through the airport security. After that he looked back one more time and wave his hands to say goodbye.

...

Present

Gab: And that's how it happened. Cindy... I know sorry is not enough.

Hindi na napigilan ni Cindy ang sarili nya. She cried out loud. Niyakap sya ni Gab to comfort her and she cling onto him. It hurts to know that even for the last time, Miko's mission was all about Cindy's future. It hurts to know na hindi na nya makakasama ang pinakamamahal nyang lalaki sa buhay nya.

After hours and hours of crying in the park where the two of them are left alone, tumahan na si Cindy. They just sat on a bench side by side in silence. Cindy thought to herself "So this is how painful it is for kuya Akhi? I can't believe he went through all this. Now I understand why a year's worth of mourning wasn't enough for him to get over Gab. It's unbelievably painful." Then she cried again in silence.

Cindy: Gab, part of me really want to blame it all on you. I-I'm thinking what if you never met my brother, or what if you just kept your problems to yourself? Maybe hindi mangyayari to sa kanya. But then again I know it's unfair. It was my brother's decision after all and you're his family.

Gab: Cindy...

Cindy: Gab, I finally understand what Kuya Akhi is going through right now.

then there was a moment of silence between them.

Cindy: Remember what my brother told you before he left? Sabi nya ayusin mo ang buhay at relationship mo.

Gab: Yes. *sigh* He did.

Cindy: Please Gab... Honor my kuya's last request to you. Ayusin mo ang relasyon nyo ni Kuya Akhi. I will never forgive you if you don't! *tears pouring endlessly once again*.

Gab: Cindy, I will try my best. I will not let you and Miko down.

Cindy: Oh you better!

She smiles bitterly with tears on her eyes then forced a chuckle.

Gab: But please understand Cindy, it is not the time to tell everyone else about the truth.

Cindy: *inhales a long breath and releases it* Fine.

Gab: Cindy, again I am so sorry.

Cindy: You know what kuya Gab, I finally realized that after all this time, I am in love with kuya Miko.

Gab: *sigh* Cindy, I may not know him long enough but I can tell that he felt the same way about you. Walang pagkakataong nagkakasama kami na hindi ka nya nababanggit saakin. he's always worried about you. He kept telling me stories about you and told me how much you meant to him. For what it's worth, I think you should know.

Cindy: Thanks kuya Gab.

She leaned to him and rested her head on his shoulder as she continued crying in silence.

Cindy: I am gonna help you with kuya Akhi. But I am not doing this for you. I am doing this for Kuya Miko.

Gab pats Cindy's arm.

Gab: Thank you Cindy.

After about an hour more, umuwi na silang dalawa and tried their best to pretend that there's nothing wrong with them para walang makahalata.

...

Nakatulog pala ako sa dining table while reading my favorite book nang marinig kong may pumasok sa front door. I was curious so I took a peek. it was Cindy and Miko. I waited for them to come back para sana makasabay silang mag dinner since Ross and Gideon already had dinner outside. I greeted them and nagulat sakin si Miko.

Akhi: Hi guys. bakit late na kayo umuwi?

Cindy: Ahhh, may pinag usapan lang kami ni Kuya Miko.

Lumapit sakin si Cindy at niyakap ako.

Akhi: What's wrong?

Cindy: Kuya, I just wanna say be happy! Don't give up on love. I support you!

I am so confused right now. I stared at Miko and he just stared back at me.

Miko: Bakit gising ka pa?

Akhi: I was waiting for you guys to come back para sana may kasabay ako mag dinner pero nakatulog na ako.

Cindy: Well I am famished! So let's go.

She took the lead and we're left alone. Lumapit sakin si Miko and kissed me on the cheek and I swear I can feel myself blushing.

Miko: Come on.

He went on to follow Cindy as my gaze followed him. I touch my cheek and remember the feeling of his lips on it. It warmed my heart.

Cindy: Kuya! Halika na!

Then I snap out of my thoughts then followed them to have dinner.

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